If you want to torture me, put me in a room with people with the rules being you can only talk about surface level topics. Nothing deeper, nothing about what we are all really feeling and thinking and worrying or wondering about. That would be torture. My blog has felt that way to me. Surface. Superficial.     I have not felt free and fearless like I used to. I have not felt inspired or guided like I have in the past. I'm hoping I will feel inspired, free and fearless soon but right now It seems there are other things that are more important to me than writing. Most of what's happening at the deeper levels of my life I feel unable to talk openly about.  Some things feel too sacred. Some things feel like they would make me more vulnerable than I already am. Some things feel like they are not my stories to share. My blog has turned a bit directionless with long stretches between posts. I know you didn't come here today to hear me whine about blogging. So stop blogging you might be thinking. While I'm thinking....Why did you come here? Where are you from and what are you wondering or worrying about below the happy surface?

I'm going to have patience with myself and with life and with my friends lives and my family's lives.   So many things feel like they are in transition....I guess all of life is a constant state of change and transition. I'm going to be patient. I need to make some decisions and figure some things out and the fact that it's spring makes it all seem possible. Everything starting fresh and being reborn.

Have a lovely day...