just when I thought my blog was getting boring....

Hollyhocks always remind me of my Grandma Cleo.

She had some that grew by the side of her house and once she made a doll for me using the blooms.

Summer is officially here. It has been so hot and dry. There have been fires all over Utah. 

My lawn looks half dead and it's June 29.

My Hydrangia is happy though :)

My one and only cousin on my mom's side is here visiting from Georgia. 

I'm so happy she is here.

We have been busy preparing for her arrival and now she is finally here.

It's going to be a fun week

My days are full.

Some days I'm in love with my life, other days I'm the epitome of complete apathy toward my life.

I feel like laying on my bed and not moving. It all seems like too much work.

Every day I think of writing about my messy, confusing fascinating (to me) life. 

Every day I don't seem to want to make the time to squeeze it in. 

I don't want to go to the effort to organize my thoughts and feelings in a way I feel comfortable publishing. I've even been skipping the journal writing.

Summer with kids in a big happy, social, mormon neighbohood is busy and intense. 

Not very much time for quiet reflection. 

I thought I'd be recording and practicing and singing more this summer. Instead I'm going to doctor's appointments for me and for Emmaline. I feel like I'm taking care of what is most important and everything else is patiently waiting.....

Emmaline has been going to a chiropractor that specializes in  chiro-mat. The mat stands for  muscle activation technique, for her knee and hip pain. 

She is feeling so much better!

I have been going to the same clinic for my interesting hormonal situation.

My blood tests came back that I am post menopausal.

Did you hear me?

I said post.

Like it's already happened.

Like my body pulled the wool over my eyes and snuck me through menopause in my mid thirties.

I thought my iud was what made my cycle stop.

Let's pray my mother never reads this post. She would pass out at my openness.

Now I can look back at the past couple of years with a whole new understanding.

I can also look back with so much mercy for myself.

I've done pretty well considering all the crazy changes my body has made it's way through. 

I found an article called The Wisdom of Menopause.

It describes perfectly what the past couple of years have been like for me.

Especially 2010.
Who knew menopause wasn't all bad?
Not me.
My brain really did morph.
More on my menopausal journey later, now I must go to sleep and hope for sweet dreams.
Goodnight.