I feel blocked and I don't know why. Is it me? Is it something I'm doing or not doing? Am I waiting around when I should be doing? But what should I be doing? Or should I be waiting? Or should I be doing something entirely different than what I'm trying to do? What the heck is wrong???
I was thinking about the last time I felt really blocked. It was last summer. At that point I was writing 2 or 3 songs a week. I was on roll. Then, I felt blocked. I felt like nothing was right. Nothing was good enough. I couldn't figure out what I needed to do so I did nothing. Then when I tried to fix my "everything is wrong feeling" that didn't work either because nothing was good enough and everything was not right! I was freaked out because I couldn't write a song. I'd start and I'd get one verse and it'd sound like a great beginning then nothing..........I couldn't finish a song. It made me worry. Just like my song writing skill magically appeared in my life was it magically going to disappear? The day before we were about to leave for a weeks vacation I decided I was going to stay up late and figure out what was wrong in my head and write a song if it killed me. It felt like I had to re learn how to write a song that night.
Step 1: Don't run away from your uncomfortable emotions, sit still in them.
Step 2: Sit still in your uncomfortable emotions long enough that they can turn into thoughts
Step 3: Let the thoughts turn into words that you write down
Most important step
Step 4: Don't judge yourself. don't edit your self. Be honest even if you sound immature and selfish (you must be alone so no body can hear you. Then you won't worry about anyone else judging you. My family was sound asleep)
Here is the song I wrote that summer night. It is called I Surrender
I hope you can understand the words. If not let me know and I'll type them out next time. The process of writing this song helped me realize I was paralyzed and unhappy because I was wanting everything to be perfect. Perfection isn't going to happen in this life. This song helped me move on and accept who I am and what my life is right now. I think I need to do that today. I'm feeling a bit on the grouchy side today. It's snowing for one. The house is always a mess for two. I'm just overall bugged. I wish everything I did was better but it's not. I just have to accept what is right now and keep trying to improve. I need to accept my messy house for now, I have 5 young kids with lots of friends. I need to accept the snow even if it is April, I live in Utah. I need to accept that all my projects for the house take time and money, take it one step at a time. I need to accept the fact that I can't please everyone, I just need to please God.
I think my 4 steps I use to write songs are the same 4 steps I take when I'm trying to figure problems out in my life. These steps help me process all the tricky details and feeling that life creates. They're good for more than just song writing.
I was thinking about the last time I felt really blocked. It was last summer. At that point I was writing 2 or 3 songs a week. I was on roll. Then, I felt blocked. I felt like nothing was right. Nothing was good enough. I couldn't figure out what I needed to do so I did nothing. Then when I tried to fix my "everything is wrong feeling" that didn't work either because nothing was good enough and everything was not right! I was freaked out because I couldn't write a song. I'd start and I'd get one verse and it'd sound like a great beginning then nothing..........I couldn't finish a song. It made me worry. Just like my song writing skill magically appeared in my life was it magically going to disappear? The day before we were about to leave for a weeks vacation I decided I was going to stay up late and figure out what was wrong in my head and write a song if it killed me. It felt like I had to re learn how to write a song that night.
Step 1: Don't run away from your uncomfortable emotions, sit still in them.
Step 2: Sit still in your uncomfortable emotions long enough that they can turn into thoughts
Step 3: Let the thoughts turn into words that you write down
Most important step
Step 4: Don't judge yourself. don't edit your self. Be honest even if you sound immature and selfish (you must be alone so no body can hear you. Then you won't worry about anyone else judging you. My family was sound asleep)
Here is the song I wrote that summer night. It is called I Surrender
I hope you can understand the words. If not let me know and I'll type them out next time. The process of writing this song helped me realize I was paralyzed and unhappy because I was wanting everything to be perfect. Perfection isn't going to happen in this life. This song helped me move on and accept who I am and what my life is right now. I think I need to do that today. I'm feeling a bit on the grouchy side today. It's snowing for one. The house is always a mess for two. I'm just overall bugged. I wish everything I did was better but it's not. I just have to accept what is right now and keep trying to improve. I need to accept my messy house for now, I have 5 young kids with lots of friends. I need to accept the snow even if it is April, I live in Utah. I need to accept that all my projects for the house take time and money, take it one step at a time. I need to accept the fact that I can't please everyone, I just need to please God.
I think my 4 steps I use to write songs are the same 4 steps I take when I'm trying to figure problems out in my life. These steps help me process all the tricky details and feeling that life creates. They're good for more than just song writing.
Grandpa/Cliff/Dad
ReplyDeleteAlways told me that if you were not sure or had a stupor of thought to just wait and not do anything until you felt a clear direction...it has proved to be very good advice.